Tag Archives: what i ate wednesday

What Does Binge Eating Disorder Look Like?

It’s What I Ate Wednesday, and it’s been awhile since I’ve checked in with all of you on how my Binge Eating Disorder has been. I thought I’d take today to do that.


If you went by the pictures I took today, my eating would appear to be in check. Seamus made me a yummy egg sandwich on a GF muffin, and I had a banana. Sadly, I didn’t stop there – as soon as Seamus and Emmett left, I jumped to the fridge and ate two slices of pizza. They were delicious, and I regretted them the second I started eating them, but as usual, I felt out of control and didn’t know how to stop myself. I polished off the two pieces and continued my self-hatred until I got into the office, where I was quickly distracted by work.


The distraction kept me occupied for a couple of hours, because I didn’t think about food until lunch time came around and I started smelling everyone’s delicious food (or not so delicious in the case of some frozen meals). Either way, the second I started smelling the food smells, all I could think about is food. A sub, to be exact, heavy on the onion and mayo. I got through a few more work things, and then I rushed out the door. I grabbed a turkey sub from Subway and headed home to sit on the couch and binge.

While I was sitting on the couch, I realized that I hadn’t gotten a picture of my food. Then, the thought popped into my head, “I wouldn’t want to have taken a picture. I don’t want anyone knowing what I am eating. I’ll just lie and say I had something healthy and that I forgot to grab a picture.” That was almost literally the thought that went through my head. And I almost did it, I almost lied to you, readers. But then, while I was bathing Emmett, I had a small epiphany… Maybe if I am honest and up-front with what I went through, it will help me overcome some binge eating issues, and it could possibly help someone else down the line, who may be struggling with the same thing.

When it came time to leave work, I had to fight a very strong urge to go to Starbucks and buy all the things. I managed, by a constant voice in my head saying, “Emmett’s in the car, Emmett’s in the car. You don’t want to be a bad role model for him.” I ended up with just a coffee, which is why I was going there anyway.


Dinner was easy because I was home with Seamus. I rarely binge when he’s around because I don’t want him to see me doing it. He knows, I’ve shared my struggles with him, but I don’t want him to see it. He probably wouldn’t judge me, but I don’t want to even take the risk, so I eat a normal amount and keep the binging to myself.

So, friends, I’ve laid it all out there. It’s so scary to be so forthcoming with things, but I really want to get better, and keeping it a deep dark secret isn’t working, so I’m figuring that I may as well try sharing and see if I get to a better spot.

I’m linking up with Peas and Crayons, thanks for hosting, Jenn.

What I Ate Wednesday – What Week are We On?

This past week has flown by, and now it’s time for What I Ate Wednesday again!

I’ve been joining up and linking with Jenn at Peas and Crayons for some time now, that I am not even sure how many week’s it has been. Oh well, I enjoy sharing my eats with you, so it honestly does not matter how many Wednesdays it’s been. 🙂

How has your week been?

Mine has been pretty decent, it’s flying by, but that just means the weekend is almost here. Yahoo! Though, the thought of a weekend in the new home gives me a bit of anxiety. We’ve lived here through two weekends and each one has been pretty unpleasant. I’m really hoping that they’re adjusting, we’re adjusting and we can have a nice relaxing time.

Saturday, I think we’re going to get Emmett’s haircut and then Sunday we’re headed out to visit my parents to celebrate a birthday. Whose, you might ask? MINE! 😀 I turn 33 on April 16th, and since my parents will be down visiting my sister on my actual day, we’re celebrating a few days early. I don’t mind at all!

And now….My What I Ate Wednesday!

Guess what I started my day with? Betch’cha can’t guess! (Okay maybe you can, since I start this way, everyday)


And I had my usual breakfast, a delicious gluten-free bagel, egg and American cheese, plus a banana. Mmmm

what i ate wednesday 4914 10

I forgot to snap a picture of my snack, but it was my delicious berry mixture with unsweetened coconut and GF granola, but it was so darn good.

I live close enough to work that I can go home for lunch. It’s awesome! I can come home and relax for 50 minutes or so, and I don’t have to worry about packing a lunch that day. I won’t be able to do it everyday, but any time I have the opportunity to do it, I will. Today’s lunch was my new favorite meal, Chicken Tacos to Die for (click the link and make them).

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Oh and I can’t lie, I did have a couple K-Toos – SO good!

I skipped my afternoon snack, but my wonderful co-worker stopped and picked up Starbucks. Woohoo! There’s always room for Starbucks!


Dinner was fantastic! Seamus grilled up some delicious chicken and zucchini and I ate it so quickly that I didn’t get a picture.


I was part of the clean-plate club tonight. Ha! I love grilling season!

Welp, that does it. Stop on over and and link-up with Jen from Peas and Crayons.

Your turn!

What were some of your yummy eats today?


What I Ate Wednesday – Binge Eating Disorder

What someone with Binge Eating Disorder really looks like?

February 23rd – March 1st is designated as Eating Disorders Awareness week. For the first time in my life, I am working to get in charge of my eating, so that I am no longer following in the shadow of my disorder.


I’ve shared with you over the last few months my struggles with Binge Eating Disorder (You can read them all here.) It is something that I have defined my life by for years. I never had a name for it, but I knew the struggle. Every single day would begin with a thought about when the next time I was going to get fast food (since that was my fancy) would be. Literally, my alarm would go off, I’d roll out of bed and start thinking about food. It has consumed my life!

I am not healed, but I have begun the healing process (more to come on this in future posts). In an effort to grow the parts of me that are NOT food related, I thought I’d dedicate this post to talking about my identity that does not involve food.


So what DOES someone with Binge Eating Disorder look like anyway?

  • I am a loving wife, mother, daughter, sister and aunt.
  • I have an amazing sense of humor, and can laugh at even the dirtiest of jokes.
  • I love having friends, but am terrible at keeping ties with everyone. I do my best!
  • I adore making jewelry, and miss making it (It’s been since Emmett’s birth since I’ve created).
  • I am a supervisor at a health insurance company, and proud of my job. I am slowly but surely learning my way.
  • I love comfy jammies, soft blankets and weekends curled on the couch.
  • I swoon over the way Emmett says the word cuddle – “duddle” – and the fact that he enjoys partaking in my cuddles so much.
  • I love reading AND writing. My reading list is never ending, as is my list of topics to write about.
  • I love getting up early, but I wouldn’t consider myself a morning person, because I also enjoy staying up late.
  • Coffee is often the first thing I sip in the mornings.
  • The feeling of working hard and accomplishing a goal I set for myself, gives me the ultimate feeling of satisfaction.
  • I want 4 kids simply because I loved growing up in a big family, but realize I will likely have less.
  • I have an amazing support system, in my husband, family and very close friends.
  • I’ve suffered with depression off and on for most of my adult life, but I am working hard to overcome the struggles.
  • I am right handed, my eyes are a beautiful blue-green hazel and my hair is naturally blonde (with some highlights added  in).
  • I trust too swiftly and fully, so that when I am crossed I fall hard.
  • My middle name is Therese and I love love love it!
  • I love the feeling of my body when it is sore from a tough workout, but have such a hard time motivating myself to get out the door.
  • And finally, I am a woman who is on a journey of a lifetime.

Those are not in any particular order, but I would say that’s a pretty cumulative list of who I am as a person outside of my disease. I created this list, so that you, my lovely readers would know me better, but also so that I have it to refer to when the going gets tough.

As always, thank you for reading – your support and encouraging words has been so so helpful in my quest.


Thanks to Jenn of Peas and Crayons for hosting!

What I Ate Wednesday – #22

It’s Wednesday, and that means it’s What I Ate Wednesday time again.

I know for the last few weeks I’ve been discussing my Binge Eating Disorder, and how I am coping – this week I am taking a break from that, and just doing a regular old What I Ate Wednesday. I figured, it’s been awhile since I posted one, everyone MUST be curious to what I’ve been eating lately, right!? 😉

Alright, onto my Wednesday Eats…

My morning started out as it normally does, with a delicious HOT cup of Joe.


I don’t know about some people, but once I start getting tired (around 8 pm) and worn out, I start dreading all of my chores that I still need to get done. However, there is one chore that I never mind completing – making my coffee for the next day! All I need to do is think about what a zombie I would be without it, or sitting on the couch blogging and not having it next to me, and I immediately run to the coffee maker and get it prepped for it’s 4:40 am wake-up call.

My breakfast has been the same lately, a bagel with 1 egg and a slice of cheese. Nothing fancy, but it keeps me from running immediately to the drive-thru upon leaving the house, sadly no picture was taken since it was eaten on the road.

I skipped a snack today because I was busy when I usually eat, and when I did have time to eat it was almost lunchtime. I knew I was headed out to Giancarlo’s, and I really love that place.  I had a panini with grilled chicken, bacon, a smoked paprika aioli and Gorgonzola, it was delicious but by the time it got to our table it was pretty cold. Ah well, least it tasted good!

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Dinner was a quick and easy one. We made Mexican Pizzas, ate quick and then actually had time to play as a family. That hasn’t happened since Sunday. Busy Busy Busy!

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I’m sure if you live anywhere, you know it’s been cold in the North East. I honestly haven’t really complained about it because I don’t mind winter or snow, but today was brutal. I had to pump gas because I was at a half of tank and I don’t like going below that. While I was standing there pumping, I was squinting my eyes so I could avoid some of the wind and snow. The wind was so strong and the air so cold that I started to get a brain freeze, gosh darn-it, that hurt!


View from my office window.

Alright, well that about does it for my Wednesday eats – be sure to stop over and visit Jenn of Peas and Crayons and link it up!

Your turn!

What are some of your favorite work lunches? I need something fresh and new!



What I Ate Wednesday – Binge Eating Disorder

Wiki describes binge eating disorder as an eating disorder characterized by binge eating without subsequent purging episodes.

Hidden “Talents”


When you have binge eating disorder, anything can cause a binge. Some individuals are triggered by stress, some happiness, others everything. I fall into that everything category.

I get a new job, I binge.

I get into an argument with Seamus, I binge.

I forgot my lunch, I binge.

For me, there is no rhyme or reason to what might trigger a binge, it happens so frequently, that I could probably say living life can cause a binge. I wish it were a simple point in my life that caused me to fly off the rails, because I would simply work to cut that out, but it is literally anything…good or bad.

Since so much of my life consists of food, what I’m going to eat and when I’m going to eat it, I have maximized my ability to hide what I’ve eaten. I’m not bragging. I wish this weren’t the case, but I have come up with every scenario you can think of to ensure that as few people know about my food choices as possible (that is until now).

When Seamus and I first started dating he didn’t know I dealt with this, heck he didn’t know how severe this was until over just last year. Every once in awhile he’d find receipts that I had forgotten to hide or throw out, and he’d comment on what was purchased. I’d always pass it off as a one time thing, or that I only did that for special occasions. Never EVER admitting what was really happening, until one day I just needed to come clean with how bad things really were. Whether it bothers Seamus or not, I have no idea. He is nothing but supportive, and there has never been a time that I’ve felt judgement. For this I am thankful, I don’t think I could have come clean here, or even to him without that constant support.

I mentioned earlier that I am an expert at hiding what I’ve eaten, and the subsequent trash. Trust me, none of my examples are rocket science, but it has kept so many people in my life in the dark until my admission on Baby Doodah! Here’s an example: I’m on my way home, I just left work and am feeling like a coffee. I’ll swing through Tim Horton’s, and order any number of things, along with my coffee. I’ll eat everything I ordered and then either hide the trash below the driver’s seat in my car, or I’ll put it in my work bag and throw it out once I arrive at work the next morning. I get home with just my coffee, and no one is the wiser.

I am not proud, it’s actually the opposite, I am ashamed. It has taken me awhile to write out this post because I wasn’t sure how deep into the details I wanted to get, but since I’ve put so much out there already, I figured why stop now. I want to share who I truly am, in hopes that it will help someone else who is struggling with binge eating disorder, as I am.

In case you’ve missed them, here are my other two posts on the binge eating disorder struggle. My Admission and Coming Clean on the Amounts of Food that I Eat.

Your turn!

If you have struggled or are currently struggling with Binge Eating Disorder, I would love to hear from you either in the comments below, or feel free to email me. My address is in the Contact Me! section of the blog.

Be sure to stop over and visit Jen at Peas and Crayons!


What I Ate Wednesday – #21

Woot Woot! It’s What I Ate Wednesday time again!

Phew! What a day. I am tired and ready for bed, but I really wanted to get this blog posted before I head to dreamland.

Breakfast was a nice and simple breakfast Egg McSeamus, a toasted bagel with 1 egg, and a slice of cheese. I’ve pretty much cut gluten out of my breakfast entirely, but I was just sick of avocado and couldn’t bring myself to eat another one this morning, instead I opted for my old standby, it was delicious. Sadly, I forgot to grab a picture of breakfast.

My snack was something new and delicious, a recommendation from a good friend. I took some Trader Joe’s Organic Pumpkin and mixed it with, honey, unsweetened coconut, raw pumpkin seeds, pecans and cinnamon. It was DEEE-licious! I made too much of it, though, and ended up throwing over half of it out. It may look like baby diarrhea, but I assure you it tastes nearly like pumpkin pie. Yummy!

what-i-ate-wednesday-124-3Lunch was my typical salad, romaine lettuce, Krakus Ham, oven roasted chicken, sunflower seeds, blue cheese crumbles and Lite honey mustard. I know I eat this weekly but it is just so darn good! I actually look forward to eating this everyday.

what-i-ate-wednesday-124-2Tis the season for clementines. I love them and eat them frequently at this time of year.

what-i-ate-wednesday-124-1I needed a mid-afternoon pick-me-up and went with a delicious Tim Horton’s k-cup.

what-i-ate-wednesday-124Seamus typically works out on Wednesdays so we keep our meals nice and simple. Tonight’s was some delicious Al Fresco Apple Chicken Sausages, sauerkraut and leftover Tuscan potatoes from my mother-in-law (they were out of this world). If you’ve never tried the chicken sausages before, you really should, they’re delicious, sweet and savory all rolled into one.



And because I love this picture and because he looks so much like me in it…

what-i-ate-wednesday-124-5That’s it for this week’s What I Ate Wednesday. Be sure to jump on over to visit Peas and Crayons and link-up.

Your turn!

What has been some of your favorite food over the past week?

You can read some of my other What I Ate Wednesday posts, by clicking here.


What I Ate Wednesday – #20

It’s definitely What I Ate Wednesday time, again!

Hey there! It’s 5 am and I’m feeling energetic, positive and ready to tackle today. It’s likely to be a busy one at work, so I’m glad that I have this energy now.

Guess how I started my morning? With a cup of coffee, on the porch! For those of you that live in Buffalo (or the surrounding areas), know that we got a decent amount of snow last night and are probably wondering what the heck is wrong with this crazy woman. 🙂 Well, I only spent about 10 minutes outside, took some really pretty pics and then came back in. It’s just too lovely outside to even think of missing it. It is early, so very little of the snow on the ground has been touched (though, our plow guy has already come and gone, whoop whoop), and I just love the look of untouched snow. Plus, it is really light snow and is sitting prettily on the tree branches.
When that happens, I always feel like I’m walking in a winter wonderland. So, yes, I did take a sip of coffee while on the porch, but the rest of it was enjoyed with my butt firmly planted on the couch, under my warm blanket.

I’ve already mentioned it, but here’s my yummy morning coffee.

what-i-ate-wednesday-1127Okay, so I have to admit that I haven’t taken a picture of one single other item of food from today. It’s been a busy day and I didn’t even think to take any photos of my food. I can tell you what I ate, though. Breakfast was my usual hard boiled eggs and avocado, lunch was a chicken sandwich that I grabbed from BK on my way back from getting my oil changed and dinner was pizza with family.

My sister and her family arrived this evening! They flew in around 5:30 and everyone came over for dinner. It was Seamus, Emmett and I, my mom and dad, my brother, and baby sister, and of course, my other sister, her husband and daughter. It was so much fun to have our house full to the brim with people. We ordered pizza from Zetti’s, and spent a wonderful couple hours visiting and watching the babies play. They were really cute with one another, not quite playing together but playing in the same area. So much fun! I can’t wait till Saturday to see them again.

Alright, that’s it for today, folks! Be sure to stop on over to Peas and Crayons and link-up with What I Ate Wednesday.

Your turn!

Do you get snow? Do you love it, like I do?

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